Journal

Beaufort & Blake: 5 Gentlemen You’ll See on Valentine’s Day

It’s almost that time of the year already – Valentine’s Day. For some gentlemen, it’s a chance to dote on their other half whilst for others it’s a chance to raise a glass to the merits of single life. Regardless of which camp you might sit in, if you’re planning on heading out this Valentine’s Day then here are five gentlemen you’re likely to see:

1. The Hopeless Romantic

The table has been booked (for months); the champagne is on ice and the roses at the ready. This gentleman has Valentine’s Day mapped out like a military operation, with calendar reminders set for each step of the day. The hopeless romantic has already researched the restaurant menu to ensure he’s well versed on which wines to pair with which dish. Most likely to have already pre-selected the filter he’ll use for the obligatory ‘couple selfie’.

2. The Last Minute Lothario

A hero amongst men, this gentleman somehow manages to pull it out the bag every year. Having only realised the day before that he should probably book a table, he frantically attempts to sweet talk every maître d’ in the area into providing him with a table for two. After failing miserably, he conveniently opts for a restaurant that is walk-ins only. Most likely to blame his late arrival on non-existent traffic problems or tube delays that even TFL were unaware of.

3. The Singleton

Ah, the singleton. This renegade has no time for the formality of Valentine’s Day and treats it like every other evening. For him, no money is spent on weekends away or token gifts – instead he invests heavily at the bar and settles in for a day of back-to-back Six Nations games. Most likely to drunkenly text a former flame, vehemently deny it and then delete the message.

4. The Sceptic

Valentine’s Day doesn’t even feature in this gentleman’s calendar. He shudders at the thought of a candle-lit meal and refuses to spend his hard earned money on romantic gestures. The sceptic appreciates that it’s nice to have the occasional date night but refuses to mark the occasion at any restaurant that has a Valentine’s Day special menu. Most likely to get into a heated discussion with anyone that tries to sell him a rose.

5. The Trawlerman

You’ll see a large number of these gentlemen on Valentine’s Day. Let’s just say, he casts his net wide in a desperate attempt to make up for his lack of prospects. Having exhausted all available mobile dating apps, this gentleman straps in for a night of shots, banal small talk and trying to remember names. Most likely to have the best story to tell from Valentine’s Day!

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