Journal

Beaufort & Blake: 5 Characters You're Most Likely To Meet Skiing

While packing your Beaufort & Blake shirts for the annual pilgrimage to the slopes, take some time to learn about the five characters you’re most likely to meet skiing.

1. THE SEASONNAIRE

A piste-hardened pro, this pseudo-local burns the candle at both ends in an effort to balance time on the slopes with time entertaining guests. Having worked for six days solid, this individual makes the most of their day off by dancing on the bar ‘till nights end. Having developed immunity to Jaegermeister, this individual will successfully drink you under the table and will still have prepared breakfast the next day before your third alarm has even gone off. Most likely to leave you wondering how he or she is able to make a living.

2. THE GUIDE

Tall, dark with a tan to match the colour of his coffee – this Euro-smoothie is most often found on the slopes leading inexperienced skiers to their impending doom. If he’s not hanging out with fellow guides then you’ll find this individual at the bottom of button lifts attempting to get his young ski-school group to grasp the concept of keeping their skies together. Most likely to have taught you your first French swear word as a child.

3. THE CYGNET

Graceful as they come, the cygnet has been skiing from a young age and can be found gliding effortlessly down even the most technical of runs. As beautiful as her skiing technique, this individual will often be surrounded by an equally good-looking harem – of which you’ll spend the whole day trying to keep up with. Most likely to be the main reason you broke your leg showing off.

4. THE PART-TIMER

This individual maps out their alpine days not by how many slopes they’ve conquered but instead how many vin-chauds they’ve sunk. When it gets to lunchtime, the part-timer likes to settle in for a drink or two and soak up the high altitude sunshine to offset any potential goggle marks. If the weather takes a turn for the worst then you’ll struggle to ply this one away from your chalet spa and a box set of Friends. Most likely to know the best lunch spot in les trois vallées.

5. THE PARK-RAT

When together the park-rats seem to speak another language, using made up words and sounds that express their delight and support for each others gravity-defying tricks. You’ll spot their brightly coloured ‘shread threads’ from a mile off and will be baffled how they’re able to backflip with their trousers round their ankles. Most likely to be dropping ski-film tunes on the chair lift up.

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